Discovering Your Core Values In 6 Easy Steps
Core values.
Are you familiar with this term “core values?”
Core values are basically your deepest belief systems.
The things that you deem most important in your life, in the world, in relationships, it's basically your north star; your inner compass.
Core values are your authentic truth.
So, if core values are your authentic truth, then they are immensely important because they basically help you respond in situations, make decisions, and set goals for yourself.
When you're really connected to your core values, you CANNOT make a wrong decision.
You cannot respond inappropriately, because if you’re choosing a response or a decision based on your deepest core beliefs and values, you cannot go wrong.
This being said, it’s not always easy.
Following your core values doesn’t mean it’s the simplest route …. but it’s ALWAYS the best route.
When I listen to my own values, often, the answers aren’t what I’d hoped for, because choosing my authenticity means facing difficult decisions, setting boundaries, or creating goals that are more challenging than I may have wanted.
It’s easier to run and hide from discomfort, or suppress our emotions.
Turning inward for the answers (to our core values), means stepping up, leaning in, and being real with ourselves and others.
For example, one of my five values is honesty.
Given that I deem honesty as foundational in all relationships in my life, I make choices based on truth. No lies, no covering things up hoping they’ll go away, and this also means being honest with myself.
Does this set me up for uncomfortable conversations? Sure does, but if I didn’t have these uncomfortable conversations in the short run, I’d be living out of alignment with my authentic truth, and surviving in discomfort for the long run.
Now you may care about honesty in your own life, but for you, there may be other core values that are more important.
Everybody's core values are different.
Because every human is different, everybody's core values differ, and that's what makes the world balanced and wonderful.
How do you figure out what your core values are?
1. Find a core values list. You can either Google a core values list, or click the link below for the one I’ve attached. Print the list out and circle all of the values that really resonate with you.
2. Additionally, think about people that you really admire, people that you aspire to be like, these people will help you hone in on what you deem important in life. Because you see these values in them, it will help you recognize what’s most important to you?
3. Think about experiences in your life that have been really impactful for you. Moments that have molded who you are in a positive way. Recall experiences that are memorable, and important to you. These moments may be the littlest things; a person who was kind to you in a store, someone who helped guide you, an experience that brought you joy etc. The littlest things can be really impactful in figuring out what your values are.
4. Next you are going to categorize all of the values that you have circled. Since a lot of them tend to overlap in meaning, you’ll list them out in groupings on a separate piece of paper.
5. Then choose one core value per category as its title; go ahead and circle that core value word.
6. Once you have all of your category titles circled, you will choose and highlight the core values that you resonate with most, narrowing it down to only five if possible.
I personally like to narrow it down, so I have four core values that I deem most important to me, but you can do five. I find that the more you narrow it down, the easier it is to recall them and reflect on them in moments when you’re trying to make decisions in your life and respond to situations.
So you’ll have your four-five core values determined.
These are your beliefs, the things that are most important to you.
When you find that you're being challenged in life, and you don't know what to do, turn back towards these core values.
Reflect and ask yourself “if I’m being true to myself, and I’m following my core values, what is the decision that I need to make right now?”
Additionally, inquire with questions like “if I’m being true to myself, authentically me, trusting my core values, what is the response that I need to make to this person right now?” or “If I’m being true to myself, authentically me, turning to my core values, what are the goals that are best for my future?”
These are all really important questions to ask yourself in challenging times when you feel overwhelmed.
At first it may seem forced and unnatural, but it will become second nature as you begin to trust your authentic voice.
Trust and know that your core values will never steer you wrong.